Suffering From Temperly Insanity

Like the dawning of a new day after a storm, Alice Temperly is providing me with a glimmer of hope that inexpensive lines by big name designers for large marketable chain stores do not need to be made of pure polyester. Behold, the Alice Temperly Go International line for Target!

I plan on being at my local Target when they open! While I normally try not to be awake at 8 am on a Sunday, I can make exceptions when dealing with shopping.

Here are my predictions/desires:


This dress is adorable, although I did think it was a belted coat at first... It's a good length, and perfect for the upcoming season... I will def. get this.

Hmm... the dress apparently comes in gray too... which make this all the more difficult in the end- gray is also a good fall/winter color.... and since black is the more common of a choice... I guess it will come down to how it looks on me. I don't particularly care for that belt. I think it looks too wide and appears to be squashing the already thin model, so I can't imagine how it would look on me. I do like the long sweater though- it looks very warm and cosy, but I'm left wondering how chunky of a knit it is... remember ladies, if a knit is chunky, just imagine what it makes you look like.
I adore the hat...it looks just slouchy and soft enough to be trendy, but not so french that people will assume I'm a mime. Although with the black and white striped shirt...it's v.v. mime-ish. I covet the jacket... I will make it mine. And the pants... well, in this picture they look like plain black pants, so it may not be worth the effort.
Okay, so I'm buying this jacket. I don't know if my bulging closet can handle all this, but yes, I will somehow make room for another jacket in my life. The ruffle detailing looks sweet, and the ecru color gives it an innocent touch, but the way the bottom of the jacket is curved up... gives it a slight naughty appeal.
Well, the fit of the pants are terrible. I'm having trouble telling if they're cropped or shoved into boots, but regardless, no. The color of the jacket is nice, but I think I'm over military jackets for a while... and I'd really love to see the blouse by itself- with the tie at the neck it looks like one of the DKNY secretary blouses.

I already know I will not be buying this. It will make me look preggers. And that is not a good look.
I think I like this coat... maybe...kinda... I can't tell. These icons need to be bigger! My eyes are getting bad, goddamnit.
The blue blouse looks sweet, and I like the unexpected color, instead of it just being white or black. The black mini... well, anyone can make a basic black mini.... but not just anyone can wear them. Curvy women such as myself, a mini should not grace our thighs.
I am not a fan of pants this length- specially for fall/winter. A cropped pant has no use to me in colder months; I will have to wear tights under it, and one should not have to don tights + pants just to stay warm. The vest is eh. The shirt looks adorable and Victorian, and resembles the gray dress in this line.
Adorable sweater! I love the stark black & white leaf designs on the body, and the striped sleeves. Very sweet, very french.

I'm unsure on how I feel about this dress... the pattern seems very detailed and graphic in this picture... but a halter dress in this time of year.... well, I suppose you could wear this to some semi-formal dance; for it seems to casual to wear to a fancier party, and the print isn't really a fall/winter print... But the color scheme is a variation on a classic... instead of just black & white, you have tiny pops of bright pink which wakes up the entire piece.
The dress is cute. Simple black dress- nothing too special. Kind of reminds me what one would wear during a dance recital. When they weren't the prima ballerina.
While the shirt looks sweet and Victorian, the overalls? Overalls just scream "hick" to me. Even though these overalls are shaped differently than ones you might wear while schucking corn, they're still overalls.
The dress looks sweet, and by the way she's standing you can see through her cap sleeve, so it obviously has a sort of sheer overlay; although it's hard to see in this picture.
The pants look very sailor-esq. This seems to be quite popular with Go International designers. The vest has a funky motif, which will help it stand out from other sweater vests. I may try to pick this up, as I'm getting into sweater vests for this season.

The sweater dress is v.v. French, but then again, it could also be because of the slouchy beret she's wearing as well. I like the crisp white diamonds that dot the scoop neckline. And a belted waist is very in right now, as long as you tie this at your true waist.
While I like the deep cobalt blue of the pants, I shall not be won over by any cropped pants. It's just not happening. The tie blouse is already one on my list of must-gets, and the black vest is a maybe.... I'll have to decide in person.
Overalls are just wrong. It doesn't matter if they're a skirt, jeans, cords, pants, wide leg, skinny leg, whatever! Just say no.
Well, it looks very basic... Black pants, black jacket, black tie blouse. Basic black. woo.
The tunic looks cute- almost as a knit jumper over the white button-down blouse. The fingerless gloves are in this season... although my fingers tend to get quite easily frozen, so I don't think I'll be jumping on that bandwagon.

Simply Vile

This Sunday was the opening day of the new Vera Wang line for Kohl's. As much as I am not a fan of Kohl's, I was compelled to rush over to see what "Simply Vera" goodies I could find. My mind was so drawn to the designer name, and assuming it was similar to the "Go International" line for Target, I felt that I would find a few fab pieces.


But as we all remember that little chestnut; to assume makes and ass out of u and me.



(On another note- All the sizes run HUGE. I went down one size to an 8 & a M, and everything swam on me. I needed a 6 & a S, which almost never happens.)



I first went over to where the accessories section. While Kohl's bags typically appear cheaply made, they normally have an inexpensive price tag to accompany it. The Vera bags had the cheap material, but not the price.
This clutch looks richer in the picture than in person. Up close, it's a shiny cheap mess. It's "faux patent leather". sad. And, it's $59.
Or, for ten bucks more, you can get an even cheaper looking "faux patent leather" frame bag. Its puffy handle, and cheap plastic closure make this purse look even cheaper than the clutch.

This dress... Would you really want to pay $128 for a long shapeless sack of polyester and spandex? It looks so cheap up close it made my skin crawl.
This dress is $138... Looks sweet and simple and unassuming online, but in the store it looks like a cheap nylon dress that someone hastily stitched little crystals on so that some woman would wander over going "oooo.... shiny..."
I tried this skirt on- it was horrifying. I felt that I had swaddled some brocade curtains around my legs, total Gone with the Wind style.... It was enormous, and fell at mid-calf, which is an eternally unflattering length for every woman. Not only was it too expensive at $98, I would have had to alter it myself or send it to a tailor to shorten it.
For $48 you get to swath yourself in more polyester! It comes complete with a polyester/spandex belt. Which honestly looks like you grabbed an elastic PJ pant lining and wrapped it around your waist. Not a good look.
So, at this point you can see the trend... Vera likes this faux-ruched bodice that is held together with a spandex tie. It's still polyester, just longer... and no better, at $88.

It's like the purple polyester shirt and the black and blue polyester dress had a baby! (Is it bad that I originally type "Polyester shit" instead of shirt... Freudian slip I guess.)
I tried this on... and I did contemplate buying it for a brief moment... it was one of the view items that was made of cotton. (No Polyester!!)... it looked okay when it was tucked into a skirt... loose and the skinniest woman would look preggers. But for $54 bucks... I asked myself, "If this wasn't Vera for Kohl's, and was just some random Kohl's brand, would I pay $54 for it." Oh, that's right. No.
This was the best item she created... at $48, a decent cardi price, it was the only thing that actually seemed worth it. But then I remembered, I can get virtually the same thing at Zara for twenty bucks.
I loved the color of this top- it's completely Violet from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (which is a good color, just not an overall good look- no one wants to resemble an overstuffed blueberry). Which sadly, you basically end up looking like, in this $58 polyester ruffled baggy nightmare.
More Polyester... its a shame, you know? Just because something is less expensive doesn't mean it has to be made out of polyester.... And just because it's sold at Kohl's doesn't mean it needs to look like only middle-aged housewives who wish they worked in a corporate environment would buy it.